While travelling a sardar was carrying a binocular with him.
But he never seemed to use it while looking outside the window.
A co-passenger who was travelling with him asked why he was carrying binoculars.
The sardar simply said ... "I am on my way to see a distant relative."
Once, two Sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games
of chess to pass the time.
They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends
dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -
"Come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!"
Our Sardar, one day is at the railway station. He asks one man "When will Rajdhani Express go from here"?Man Replies 12.30. "When will Punjab Express go from here"?Man Replies 10.30. "When will Deccan Queen go from here"?Man Replies 12.30. Thus the sardar goes on asking for all the trains. Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants to go to punjab by train or not.Sardar replies, "NO. I only want to cross the tracks!"
Once a Sardarji went to the city of Mumbai for the first time to meet his father. His father had asked him to keep walking in the direction of the sunrise until he eventually reached hishouse. Since, the Sardarji was new to the city he decided to ask a passerby the direction in which the sun rose in Mumbai - east, west, north or south?The passerby who was also a Sardarji thought for some time and then said, "Main bhi is sheher mein naya aaya hoon!" ( I am also new in this city!)
Sardarji bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar, where he lived, to Jalandar to meet his friend. He reached there in a few hours. After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he didn't reach in the evening and not the next day either. When he finally reached home on the third day, his distraught mother ran and asked him " Arre Puttar, ki hoya?" (What Happened, My Son?)
The Sardarji got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "Oy, ye Marutti wale pagal hain, agge jaane waaste chaar gear banaate hain, aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik?" (These Maruti Car people are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!)
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
Santa Goes to heaven Santa Singh was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Banta. As Banta singh stood beside the bed, santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Santa used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then he died.
Banta singh thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Banta singh was visting Santa's family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all."
He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"
Sweet Revenge Santa Singh told his wife that after his death she should marry Banta Singh. "But why should I marry Banta who is your enemy no 1" enquired his wife. Santa quipped, "Oh Darling, this is the only way I can take my revenge from that useless fellow. Ha! Ha! Ha!!
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit. The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. Oye, I am only following the instructions
- 'Answer in brief'.
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
1) WHY SACHIN HAVE TWO CHILDREN,BUT SOURAV HAVE ONE?. BCOZ SACHIN HAVE SECRET ENERGY OF "BOOST".
2) Utho... Ye koi sone ka waqt hai...! Jab dekho sote rehte ho, sari umar so so ke hi bitani hai kya..? Abhi muje reply mat karna "i m sleeping..."
3) There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it. There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it
4) THOUGHT FOR THE FUTURE GENERATION- Don't marry n make a woman happy. In fact remain a bachelor n make several women happy!
5) Ladka bola Dilruba, Ladki boli Pizza khila, Wo bola Paise nahi, Ye boli -Aise nahi,
Ladka bola-Mehengayi hai, Ladki boli AAJ SE TU MERA BHAI HAI. Keep Smiling!!
6) How would a girl refuse HIMESH propose:-O-oo huzur bhar me gaya tera surur, sakal se tu hai ek khajur, bidi ke factry ka mazdoor, ho ja mujhse dur sale langoor.
7) Aishwarya coke pi rahi thi ki coke me Cheenti gir gayi. Cheenti ka baap Aishwarya ko bola, jo sun kar Aishwarya behosh ho gayi. "Teri coke me mera bacha hai...."
A porter loaded down with suitcases followed Mr. & Mrs. Santa to the airline check-in counter. As they approached the line, the husband glanced at the pile of luggage and said to the wife, "Why didn't you bring the piano, too?" "Are you trying to be funny?" she replied. "No, I really wish you had" he sighed. "I left the tickets on it."
Santa Singh sent his bio data to America to apply for a post in Microsoft. A few days later he got this reply:- Dear Mr. Singh, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone call shall be entertained. Thanks
Santa singh jumped with joy on receiving this reply. He arranged a party and when all the guests had come, he said Bhaiyon aur Behno,aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki mujhay america mein naukri mil gayee hai." Everyone was delighted. Santa singh continued Ab main aap sab ko apnaa appointment letter padkar sunaongaa par letter english main hai isliyen saath-saath hindi main translate bhee kartaa jaongaa.
Dear Mr. Singh-----pyare singh sahab
You do not meet----aap to miltay hee naheen ho
our requirement----humko to zaroorat hai
Please do not send any furthur correspondance----ab letter vetter bhejnay kee zaroorat nahee hai.
No phone call ----phone vone kee bhee zaroorat nahee hai
shall be entertained----bahut khaatir kee jayegi.
Thanks----aapkaa bahut bahut shukriya
Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to his knees
and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your
donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?"
The sardarji replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I
wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have
been missing too."
Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train. He felt sleepy
so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees
to wake him up when the station arrived.
This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees ,
the sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji fell
asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard.
When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he
went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and
suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror.
Said his wife " What's the matter?"
Replied he "The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and
woken up someone else"
Do u know What Surdarji will do after taking Xerox ?
He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes !!
6. Do u know what surdarji will do if he wants a white paper ?
(he already has one and he wants one more..) He takes a Xerox of
the white paper !!! )
Once, a Hindu, a Sardar and an American were travelling in an
aeroplane. Suddenly, something went wrong and the engines stalled. They had
no parachutes with them. So all the three of them decided to risk their lives
and jump out of their planes.
First, the Sardar jumped out. He removed his turban, used it as a parachute
and jumped. Using the turban he slowly floated down. Then the Hindu removed
his dhoti and jumped out. Again his dhoti acted as a parachute and he also
floated down gently. Seeing this, the American removed his shirt and pant
and jumped out.
Unfortunately, they did not do well as a parachute and he began to fall
rapidly from the plane to the ground. He passed by the Hindu who said
- " May Bhagwan help you".
Then he passed the Sardar. The Sardar looked at the American zooming past
him and was puzzled. So he said - "I see! You want a race! Let us see who is faster"
Saying so, he let go of his turban.
One great day in Bombay, a couple were on a honeymoon
tour. They saw one sardarji in front of a hospital
(Breach Candy) was trying to fill some form. So the
couple enquired eagerly "What are you doing ?"
Sardarji replied that I
had a baby and I am filling the birth certificate form.
The couple as per
schedule, took the Bombay to Delhi Flight for their next
destination. On the next day, they find the same
Sardarji, in front of Lal Qilla in Delhi filling the
same form.
So once again young couple
curiously asked - "What are you doing here ?"
Sardarji once again replied I had a baby and I
am filling the birth certificate form.
The couple said but
sardarji yesterday you were in Bombay filling the same
form, how come you're in Delhi?
Sardarji cooly replied
It is written here - "FILL IN CAPITALS"
The inevitable truth of life.....everyone in our life is going 2 hurt sooner or later......u just have 2 realise who is worth.....
Pappu Pass Ho Gaya ***************** TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water? PAPPU : "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about? PAPPU : Yesterday you said it's H to O ! ***************** TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America. PAPPU : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS : PAPPU! ***************** TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell "crocodile"? PAPPU : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong PAPPU : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it! ***************** TEACHER : PAPPU, give me a sentence starting with "I". PAPPU : I is...
TEACHER : No, PAPPU. Always say, "I am." PAPPU : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." ***************** TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?" PAPPU : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time." ***************** TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?" PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?" ***************** PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt? FATHER : No. Why do you ask that? PAPPU: Well, where did you get this MUMMY then? ***************** TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots ! PAPPU: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home. ***************** TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ? PAPPU: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook. ***************** TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as yourbrother's. Did you copy his ? PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog ! **************** TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? PAPPU: A teacher ****************
Moderation Team
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