99 Rajnikanth Jokes..

Hot goIITian

Posted on
24 Apr 2010 14:17:58 IST
Posts: 155
24 Apr 2010 14:17:58 IST
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99 Rajnikanth Jokes..
Engineering Entrance , JEE Main , JEE Main & Advanced , academic , Jokes

hey guys take ur mind off studies for sometime and have fun  :)

no offense to rajnikanth fans.

But before some humour, go through some helpful articles given below.

1. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.

2. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.


3. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.

4. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile.

5 .Rajnikanth can divide by zero.

6. Rajinikanth can judge a book by it's cover. 

7. Rajinikanth can drown a fish. 

8. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin. 

9. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs. 

10. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door. 

11. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes. 

12. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald's, and got it.

13. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards. 

14. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off. 

15. Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain. 

16. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone. 

17. Rajinikanth can make onions cry. 

18. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

19. Rajinikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes.

20. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice. 

21. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013. 

22. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day. 

23. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost. 

24. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano. 

25. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

26. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.

27. Rajinikanth can talk about Fight Club.

28. Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.

29. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai.

30. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.

31. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.

32. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.

33. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.

34. Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.

35. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it.

36. Rajinikanth can throw the Thackerays out of Mumbai. 

37. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird.

38. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.

39. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars.

40. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.

41. Rajinikanth once warned a young girl to be good "or else". The result? Mother Teresa.

42. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man.

43. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray. 

44. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac.

45. Rajinikanth puts the 'laughter' in manslaughter.

46. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.

47. Rajinikanth can handle the truth.

48. Rajinikanth can speak Braille.

49. Rajinikanth can dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks.

50. Rajinikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.

51. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name.

52. Who do you think taught Voldemort Parseltongue? Rajinikanth did.

53. Chuck Norris once met Rajinikanth. The result - He was reduced to a joke on the internet.

54. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated. 

55. Rajinikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth.


56. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

57. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance.

58. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost. 

59. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

60. Rajinikanth can run at speed of light around a tree and screw himself. 

61.Rajinikant can lick his elbows.

62. Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

63. Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost. 

64. Rajinikant doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

65. Rajinikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds.

66. When you say “no one is perfect”, Rajinikant takes this as a personal insult. 

67. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.

68. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born.

69. The statement "nobody can cheat death", is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.

70. When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.

71. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.

72. Rajinikanth knows what women really want.


73. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth.

74. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.

75. As a child when Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet.

76. Rajinikanth collects Honey from his private Moon - HoneyMoon. 

77. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call.

78. Rajinikanth doesn't need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates.

79. Rajinikanth's brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury's. 

80. Rajinikanth doesn't shower. He only takes blood baths.

81. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth.

82. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Rajinikanth's fist.

83. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way. 

84. Rajinikanth's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog. 

85. Rajinikant doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear. 

86. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajinikant”.

87. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up.

88. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

89. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game "Hide n' seek", as no one can hide from Rajinikanth.

90. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction.

91. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.

92. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on.

93. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth.

94. If at first you don't succeed, you're not Rajinikanth.

95. Rajinikanth's first job was as a bus conductor. There were no survivors.

96. Rajinikanth does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

97. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.

98. Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

99. Rajinikanth's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

100. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a co

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Comments (19)

New kid on the Block

Joined: 24 Apr 2010 13:48:43 IST
Posts: 1
24 Apr 2010 14:23:41 IST
0 people liked this

what the f**k u wrote

Hot goIITian

Joined: 21 Apr 2009 18:56:01 IST
Posts: 155
24 Apr 2010 14:32:04 IST
0 people liked this

excuse me do you have a problem?

Blazing goIITian

Joined: 23 Sep 2007 13:01:44 IST
Posts: 966
24 Apr 2010 15:54:49 IST
0 people liked this

i am rajni fan.. dont post such articles here again.. he is a great actor!! its shame on you to comment on him.. we all know you are nothing bfore him..

Scorching goIITian

Joined: 23 Oct 2007 14:55:36 IST
Posts: 279
24 Apr 2010 18:13:15 IST
0 people liked this

awesome!!!!!can't stop laughing

Blazing goIITian

Joined: 15 Nov 2009 11:50:54 IST
Posts: 564
24 Apr 2010 19:51:00 IST
0 people liked this


Blazing goIITian

Joined: 8 Oct 2008 04:08:09 IST
Posts: 1252
25 Apr 2010 08:27:34 IST
0 people liked this


Scorching goIITian

Joined: 26 Jul 2008 19:44:18 IST
Posts: 290
25 Apr 2010 14:39:49 IST
0 people liked this

its really funny

Scorching goIITian

Joined: 26 Jul 2008 19:44:18 IST
Posts: 290
25 Apr 2010 14:40:29 IST
0 people liked this

u cant comment south indians athiest

Joined: 19 Oct 2006 14:19:07 IST
Posts: 1558
25 Apr 2010 15:27:13 IST
0 people liked this

I'm a huge rajni fan too.. but we can all take a little easy on some fun which doesn't hurt anyone? what say guys. only thing we should completely avoid is saying bad words to each other guys!

Blazing goIITian

Joined: 8 Oct 2008 04:08:09 IST
Posts: 1252
26 Apr 2010 02:01:23 IST
0 people liked this

For all those people who take pride in there south indianness .. And are greatly inspired by the south indian songs check out this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZA1NoOOoaNwAm a south indian too.. But I really hate the southern part of india.. Lot of reasons.. Dont ask me why ..

Cool goIITian

Joined: 5 Feb 2009 16:19:44 IST
Posts: 59
26 Apr 2010 12:08:38 IST
0 people liked this

Don't post this type of things in coming next time. because he is a famous actor in the South India. don't give the pain to his fans.

Blazing goIITian

Joined: 23 Sep 2007 13:01:44 IST
Posts: 966
26 Apr 2010 19:59:17 IST
0 people liked this

u ppl suck.. we are all indians.. and u differentiate india.. u hate south indians.. u are the ppl bringing india down.. showing partiality towards each other..and wat wrong did south indians do? huh!! k leave..

Blazing goIITian

Joined: 29 Oct 2008 18:29:25 IST
Posts: 351
5 May 2010 11:13:08 IST
0 people liked this

it's reallly worst on ur part talkin in that way mr.athiest...... u have no right to stay in south if u speek so....never ever dare to comment like this......k

New kid on the Block

Joined: 15 Oct 2010 09:00:37 IST
Posts: 1
15 Oct 2010 09:05:28 IST
0 people liked this

lmao....this is hilarious..!! i have an addition to this=>a girl lost her virginity and then came crying to Rajinikanth..He got it back for he....rofl(ppl who like it, awesome...those who dont..f**k you..)

New kid on the Block

Joined: 25 Jan 2009 14:07:14 IST
Posts: 12
15 Oct 2010 09:31:01 IST
0 people liked this

and mind mr missionadmission rajnis robot is creating histroy world wide hope u dnt have any general knowledge and dnt as smone said differentiate india

Forum Expert
Joined: 1 Jun 2009 13:28:45 IST
Posts: 1331
24 Oct 2010 02:53:13 IST
0 people liked this

the scenes are hilarious and extra stupid...its make me feel like hell..!!but dont write odd abt ppl we all r the same we all r indians

New kid on the Block

Joined: 28 Oct 2010 11:44:00 IST
Posts: 1
28 Oct 2010 11:46:17 IST
0 people liked this

ha ha ha ..... lol gr8 man. Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up. So don't bother..

New kid on the Block

Joined: 30 Oct 2010 15:54:28 IST
Posts: 1
30 Oct 2010 16:02:52 IST
0 people liked this

Kirukku pundaikala.........Dnt make jokes on rajini....He s like a god for lakhs & lakhs of people...people who makes joke on him mind it, u cant even can b compared with at least a single hair of him...

New kid on the Block

Joined: 31 Oct 2010 17:10:38 IST
Posts: 1
31 Oct 2010 17:13:39 IST
0 people liked this

LOL I LOVED THIS ARTICLE...perfect jokes for laughter. I fond it funny as it was meant to be, no harm intended

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