Funny Science Quotes - Funny Quotes about Science

Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.
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***In science we are really good at disproving things and are very poor at proving things. Theories like the Theory of Relativity go on and on because no one can think of anything better.
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***We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
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***The first pull on the cord ALWAYS sends the drapes in the wrong direction.
More funny Boyle's Other Law quotes
***Whenever a system becomes completely defined, someone discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition.
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***When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong.
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***The limits of the possible can only be defined by going beyond them into the impossible.
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***Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
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***If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
More funny Finagle's First Law quotes
***No matter what the experiment's result, there will always be someone eager to: (a) misinterpret it. (b) fake it. or (c) believe it supports his own pet theory.
More funny Finagle's Second Law quotes
***In any collection of data, the figure most obviously correct, beyond all need of checking, is the mistake.
More funny Finagle's Third Law quotes
***Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.
More funny Finagle's Fourth Law quotes
***An object in motion will be heading in the wrong direction.
More funny Gerrold's First Law of Infernal Dynamics quotes
***An object at rest will be in the wrong place.
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***The chance of the bread falling with the butter side down is directly proportional to the value of the carpet.
More funny Jennings' Corollary to the Law of Selective Gravity quotes
***A few months in the laboratory can save a few hours in the library.
More funny Westheimer's Law quotes
***No experiment is reproducible.
More funny Wyszowski's Law quotes
***When I find myself in the company of scientists, I feel like a shabby curate who has strayed by mistake into a room full of dukes.
More funny W. H. Auden quotes
***It is inexcusable for scientists to torture animals; let them make their experiments on journalists and politicians.
More funny Henrik Ibsen quotes
***In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window.
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***Science may set limits to knowledge, but should not set limits to imagination.
More funny Bertrand Russell quotes
***Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths.
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***The National Academy of Sciences would be unable to give a unanimous decision if asked whether the sun would rise tomorrow.
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***Biology has at least 50 more interesting years.
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***One could not be a successful scientist without realizing that, in contrast to the popular conception supported by newspapers and mothers of scientists, a goodly number of scientists are not only narrow-minded and dull, but also just stupid.
More funny James D. Watson quotes
***My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
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***Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that has been dropped out of a helicopter.
More funny Dave Barry quotes
***The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.
More funny Mark Russell quotes
***An important scientific innovation rarely makes its way by gradually winning over and converting its opponents: What does happen is that the opponents gradually die out.
More funny Max Planck quotes
***I am tired of all this thing called science here....We have spent millions in that sort of thing for the last few years, and it is time it should be stopped. (on the Smithsonian Institution)
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