IIT JEE , AIEEE Forum - Fun Zone , Lounge - To lighten u up..... not weight wise!!!!!!!!!!

magiclko

A professor of mathematics noticed that his kitchen sink at his home leaked. He called a plumber. The plumber came the next day and sealed a few screws, and everything was working as before.

The professor was delighted. However, when the plumber gave him the bill a minute later, he was shocked. ?This is one-third of my monthly salary!? he yelled.

Well, all the same he paid it and then the plumber said to him, ?I understand your position as a professor. Why don?t you come to our company and apply for a plumber position?
You will earn three times as much as a professor. But remember, when you apply, tell them that you completed only seven elementary classes. They don?t like educated people.?

So it happened. The professor got a job as a plumber and his life significantly improved. He just had to seal a screw or two occasionally, and his salary went up significantly.

One day, the board of the plumbing company decided that every plumber had to go to evening classes to complete the eighth grade. So, our professor had to go there too. It just
happened that the first class was math. The evening teacher, to check students? knowledge, asked for a formula for the area of a circle. The person asked was the professor. He jumped to the board, and then he realized that he had forgotten the formula. He started to reason it, and he filled the white board with integrals, differentials, and other advanced formulas to conclude the result he forgot. As a result, he got ?minus pi times r square.?

He didn?t like the minus, so he started all over again. He got the minus again. No matter how many times he tried, he always got a minus. He was frustrated. He gave the class a
frightened look and saw all the plumbers whisper: ?Switch the limits of the integral!!?

rik_mad

that was awesome
"but mujhe nahin lagta professors key itney bure din bhi aa sakte hain !!! "
it was great fun reading though

uday_zingtudor

U could have added some more to it MANASI

Anyway, it's good.

shubhayan_c

Thanks a lot for improving my mood.

It was simply excellent.

kghedriu

It was soooooo nice!

why dont u give another message so that i can give u a hat...

magiclko

thanx , here are more :)

"Bhola gets a job application reply"

Bhola was looking for a job. He couldn't find one in India so started applying to US and Canada. As soon as he applied, he got a reply from a US company. Bhola was very happy and started giving treat to all his friends... Dost poocchne lagge ki....."Bhai,bataa to kon si company hai, kitni salary haai? vagarah ... vagarah...".

Apna Bhola says "English mein letter hai, per mein tumhe translate kar ke sunata hoon"....

"Woh company likhe hai...

"YOU DO NOT MEET"...

yaani ki "Tum to milte hi nahin ho...bahut busy ho"

"OUR REQUIREMENTS"...

yaani ki "Hume to bahut zaroorat hai"

"NO FURTHER CORRESPONDENCE"...

Yaani ki "Aage chitthi bhejne ki jarurat nahin hai, Jaise bhi ho jaldi se aajao"

"WILL BE ENTERTAINED"...

yaani ki "Bahut khatir ki jayegi"

magiclko

THE SPEECH

A Schoolmaster from a remote rural area was transferred to a school in Bombay. He reported for duty two days before August 15 and, as was the practice in the school, was asked to address the assembly on Independence Day.

Here's his dynamite speech :

"Leddies and Gentulmens, Contemporaries, Children, "This is my first maiden speech. If small small mistakes get inside my speech, I ask pardon. Stickly speaking, I wanted to joint your school more fastly, but for the following reason. Too much time lost in getting slipper reservation in three-tyre compartment. The clerk rejected to give ticket. I put complaint on station master. He said me to go to lady clerk. At first she also rejected. I then pressed her for long time and at last with great difficulty she gave birth to my only son. Anyway I thanked the station master because he was responsible for getting birth of my son.

We got independent because of great leaders like Gandhiji who get-outted all angrezi peoples from India. Tilak said Swaraj is our birth-rate and we shall halve it. Today we all halve our birth-rate. You children are future dynamic generators of the Nation. Look into future time only. No backside looking, or looking at your behind. Be like great like X' raj Ranjan of Germany or Presidents like Loosebelt. You know genius, no? It is one per cent perspiration and ninety seven percent evaporation. They became great by reading great books. After we finish you here in the school, you can go to college and get B.A., M.A. and other decrease. Then you can become great liars in the supreme courts, shattered accountants, or lecherers in college.

The school is like a garden. You are the seeds, school is the soil. We will bury you in this soil, pour water of knowledge on your heads and one day will become great phools. Many vacancy job come in newspapers. Only yesterday I saw in paper "Wanted for refuted engineering firm: Generators, highpower condensors" so and so forth, etc. These jobs may be teknickel, but you can rise. If you have flare in English, you can become teacher.

I am now ending this fastly. My God blast you! Thank you and thank God I am finished. Joy Hind!"

caprio.nups

gud job manasi

magiclko

thanx nupur :)... read the poem posted by me, if u like them!!!

magiclko

Waka Waka poem :D

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In English, this reads:
"waka waka bang splat tick tick hash
caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash
bang splat equal at dollar under-score
percent splat waka waka tilda number four
ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash
vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma crash"

hows this????

prakhar_galaxy

manasi your poems r really very funny
Gud ujob my friend

vinu

Hi magiclko,

Ur waka waka poem was too good ,

where did u get all these???

Btw , i couldn't enjoy the poem posted by u,'coz i don't understand hindi{I mean i don't know the meaning of some words...}

magiclko

jst got it

..... waka waka is one of the cutest poem..... one of my frnd invented it(atleast, he told me this)....

nd those others, well the first one is in hindi, n m so srry i cant help it... hows the other one??????

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