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akshay.khare91

2 sardar bank lootne gaye par gun ghar hi bhool gaye..phir bhi bank loot liya
kaise???
?
?
?
after all manager bhi sardar tha bola gun kal dikha jana...

pink_ele

hehehe......
well,
why bhajji slapped s santh..........................????????????/

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.
.
.
.
.
.
..........coz
sreesanth ne poocha thaa ki.....................

bhaiyya hum chloromint kyun khate hain????????????????????

SCIENTIST135

Teacher to a student: ?Ess line ki english banao- Usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gaya.?
Student - He done his work and done-dana-dan done-dana-dan

Boss: Where were you born ?
Sardarji: Oye Punjab.
Boss: Which part?
Sardarji: Oye, Kya which part? Whole body born in Punjab.

kria

AN OLD LADY DIED WHEN SHE WAS AN INFANT............!

guns_and_roses

President Bush went to a school in India during his visit, to interact with the children. After having one brief talk with the children he asked them if they had any question to ask him.

One boy raised his hand and stood up;

Bush: whats your name?

Ram: Ram

Bush: Whats your question?

Ram : sir I have three questions.

1) Why did America attack Iraq without the approval of UNO?

2) Where is Osama?

3) Why does America support Pakistan so much?

Bush: You are an intelligent student Ram....(just then the bell for recess

rang)

Oh dear students we will continue after the recess is over.

After the recess

Bush: Ok children where were We? Yes, so anybody wants to ask any question?

Shyam raises his hand

Bush :Whats your name?

Shyam : Sir I have 5 questions.

1) Why did America attack Iraq without the approval of UNO?

2) Where is Osama?

3) Why do America support Pakistan so much?

4) Why did recess bell rang 20 mins before the scheduled time?

5) Where is Ram?

yash_gryffindor

Osama's message to President Bush

After numerous rounds of "We don't know if Osama Bin Laden is still alive", Osama decided to personally send President Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was "still in the game".

Mr. Bush opened the letter, which contained a single line of "coded" message:

370HSSV-0773H

Mr. Bush was baffled, so he sent copies to his Chief of Staff, and several Secretaries, including Condi Rice and Donald Rumsfeld. Their assistants and aides had no clue as to the meaning or translation of the code, so it was sent to the Federal Bureau of Investigation, then to the CIA and also to NASA. With no clue to the translation, they eventually asked Israel's MOSAD for help.

Within a minute, MOSAD cabled the White House with this reply:

"Tell the President he is holding the message upside down."

yash_gryffindor

BJP AND CONGRESS

ONCE A BOY GAVE A LOTUS TO GIRL. THE GIRL GAVE HIM A TIGHT SLAP.

THE BOY ASKED HER THE REASON FOR SLAPPING HIM.

THE GIRL TOLD HIM: YOU GAVE ME BJP SO I GAVE YOU CONGRESS!!!!!!!!!!!

yash_gryffindor

go to hell

A Lawyer dies and goes to heaven. He knocks on the old pearly gates

and out walks St. Peter. "Hello mate," says St. Peter, "I?m sorry, no

Lawyers in heaven."

"What?" exclaims the man, astonished.

"You heard, no Lawyers."

"But, but, but, I?ve been a good man", replies the Lawyer.

"Oh really", says St. Peter. "What have you done, then ?"

"Well" said the guy, "Three weeks before I died, I gave 10 dollars to the

starving children in Africa".

"Oh" says St. Peter. "anything else?"

"Well, 2 weeks before I died I also gave 10 dollars to the homeless."

"Hmmm. Anything else?"

"Yeah. A week before I died I gave 10 dollars to the Albanian orphans."

"Okay", said St. Peter, "You wait here a minute while I have a word with

the boss."

Ten minutes pass before St. Peter returns.

He looks the bloke in the eye and says, "I?ve had a word with God and he

agrees with me. Here?s your thirty dollars back, now take a hike!"

yash_gryffindor

Laloo's Threat

A major traffic jam was preventing people from moving forward in d patna boring Canal Road.

A motorist shouted out wanting to know what was happening.

A guy from the front replied,

"Well at the traffic crossing Laloo Yadav is sprawled across the road.

He is refusing to move from there!"

"But why?"

"He has lost the elections and will now surely be convicted for

corruption and will have to pay lakhs of Rupess as fines!

He is threatening to douse himself with kerosene and set himself on fire if people didn't contribute with money to help him pay the fine!"

"So how much has been collected so far?"

"Six litres!"

yash_gryffindor

Clinton says

Air Force One comes in for a landing at the airport. A ramp is wheeled up and President Clinton appears carrying a pig under each arm. As he comes down the ramp, the Marine at the bottom snaps to a salute.

Clinton says, "You'll have to excuse me. I can't return your salute. My hands are full." "Yes Sir. I see the pigs Sir!" responds the Marine. "Now hold on," says Clinton. "These aren't just pigs. These are genuine Arkansas Razorbacks." "Yes Sir! Razorbacks Sir!" says the Marine. "I got this one for Chelsea and this one for Hillary," Clinton explains. The Marine answers, "Yes Sir! An excellent trade if I may say so myself Sir!"

yash_gryffindor

God is great

God was fed up. In a crash of thunder He yanked three influential men up to Heaven: Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltsin and Bill Gates.

"The human race is a complete disappointment," God boomed. "You each

have one week to prepare your followers for the End of the World."

With another crash of thunder they found themselves back on Earth.

Clinton immediately called his cabinet. "I have good news and bad news," he announced grimly. "The good news is that there is a God. The bad news is that He's really mad and plans to end the world in a week."

In Russia, Yeltsin announced to parliament, "Comrades, I have bad news and worse news. The bad news is that we were wrong; there is a God after all. The worse news is that He's mad and is going to end the world in a week."

Meanwhile, Bill Gates called a meeting of his top engineers. "I have good news and better news. The good news is that God considers me one of the three most influential men on Earth," he beamed. "The better news is that we don't have to fix WINDOWS 95."

jain108

There were three fathers to be in a hospital waiting room, waiting for their
babies to be born.

The first nurse comes out and tells the first father, "Congratulations
you're the father of two beautiful twins!"

Amazed, the man says, Great! I am the manager for the Minneasota Twins.

The second nurse comes out and tells the second father, "Congratulations
you're the father of three beautiful triplets!"

Amazed, he says, "That's cool I work for 3M."

All of a sudden, the third father opens the window and jumps out.

The third nurse comes out, and asks, "Where's the third father?"

One of the other fathers said, "Oh he jumped out the window.."

The nurse asks, "Why?"

He replied, "He works for Seven Up!"

jain108

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, "Now, boys, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face."

"Yes, sir," the boys said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow at the back shouted, "Cause yer feet ain't empty."

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