2+2=5

NugoRama

We would be dealing with logics here...

Lets get familiar..

few examples of logics are :.

The sky is blue, therefore you owe me twenty dollars.
Cheese is good, therefore I am right.
A lamprey is alive. You are also alive (hopefully), therefore you are a lamprey (hopefully).
Wars are bad and the United States is in a war, therefore the United States is bad.
Attack the argument, not the person because an argument cannot fight back but a person definitely can.
I think, therefore I am a Democrat.
There are three types of jellyfish in the world. Those who can count, and those who can't (most).

And now....

"2+2=5"

Mathematical Proofs

Given: 2 + 2 is a real number.

Let 2 + 2 = 5.
Therefore, 2 + 2 = 5. QED..

Given that k = t
I can prove E=mc²
Let E be k
And mc² be t
Since k=t, therefore, E=mc²
Take a moment to wonder on the author's amazing intellect.
QED

Proof by distraction

Look behind you!
... proves the existence of an answer for 2 + 2.
Look! A three-headed monkey over there!
... leaves 5 as the only result of 2 + 2.
Therefore 2 + 2 = 5. QED.

Proof by the rovdistic principle

I like to think that 2 + 2 = 5.
Therefore, 2 + 2 = 5. QED.

Proof by an Oscar Wilde quote

1. “And after a long study that I have not documented, I hereby declare that 2 + 2 is equal to 5.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Ultimatum Mathematica

2. Therefore, 2 + 2 = 5. QED.

Proof by Windows Error

CRITICAL ERROR 4245562234791928385960202434234:
Windows could not execute this instruction: "ADD 2,2".
Windows will use instead this randomly chosen number as an answer: 5
Therefore, 2 + 2 = 5. QED.

Proof by Vandalism

Here it says that 2 + 2 = 5
Therefore, 2 + 2 = 5. QED.

Skillful proof

4+4=10 in base 8. (it does. You're working in base 8 now)
divide both sides by 2:
therefore 2+2=5
Q.E.D.

Proof by Repetition

2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5
2+2=5

"Simple" Logic

Nobody is immortal
My friends say I'm nobody.
Therefore I'm immortal.
And 2 + 2 = 5. QED

Contradictory Logic

Anything is better than nothing.
Nothing is better than Coke.
Therefore, NOTHING IS BETTER THAN COKE.
Including Pepsi. And 5.

Immature Logic

Fart
Poo
Therefore 2 + 2 = 5

Proof by Provitute

Given nonzero A=B
AxA=BxA
A^2-B^2=AB-B^2
A-B=0
(A+B)(A-B)=B(A-B)
A+B=B
Therefore 2+2=2
Monkey

However this falls apart and is not considered a true proof by all but the most qualified biologists.

Proof by Frustration

You think 2 + 2 doesn't equal 5
Go f*ck yourself
QED

Proof by Appeal to Consequence

We are trapped in a desert and send one person to get a rescue team.
People can survive for three days without water.
It will take them two days at the most to get to civilization and two days at the most for the rescue team to reach us.
If a rescue team doesn't come, then the person we sent likely died on there way for help and no one is coming to save us.
Four days have past with no signs of a rescue team.
2+2=5

Proof by Octopus

Suppose 2+2=4
Now, also suppose I have an octopus.
I have an octopus.
QED

BUT!

If I have an octopus, I therefore have a sea-dweller as a companion.
If we assume that sea-dwellers are good at math, we are deluding ourselves.
But when I first bought the octopus, there was a sale going on.
One octopus cost 4 dollars.
Two octopuses cost $2.50.
If I were to buy two (2) pairs of octopuses, my total would come out to be five (5) dollars
2+2=5.
QED

Some people criticize this method of proving things, calling it "Excessively Verbose." However, The extra steps just prove that we allowed for more exceptions to our data, and what do those people know anyway?

Proof by Toothpicks

Lay down toothpicks in this way: II + II = IV
Take off I from IV.
2+2=5
QED

Pigeonhole Principle Logic

If there are 9 holes and 10 pigeons, we can infer that someone who was asked to build holes for the pigeons to live in them, is not doing his work properly.Hence 2+2=5. QED.

Now some more logics...Compiled from goiit ...

Ashwini di's logic :

1. agent A : what is 2+2 ?

2. agent B : its 4 u fool !

3. Ashwini di : No Its 5 ..Thread blocked.

Suppandi's logic :

1. 2+2 = ?

2. ?

3. ???

4. ??????

5. anyone ??

7. ?????????????

8. ?

9. i m getting 5 ..

10. ??

..... goes on..

Blade X's logic :

1. " DERIVATION OF THE MOST POWERFUL LAW " 2+ 2 = 5 " - BY DIPENDRA KUMAR MISHRA. DATED : dd/mm/yyyy

2. some unusually complicated stuff...

3. 2+2 = 5 QED.

Expert's logic :

1.hello dear !

2. 2+2 = 5 ...you can find it in most of the basic books like hc verma and ncert.

3. Revision is a must.

4. nothing is impossible ..

5. You can do it.

6. cheers !!

Anonymous's logic :

1.Hi!

2.i've posted an article : http://www.goiit.com/posts/list/community-shelf-2-2-5-960792.htm

3.comments and rates invited.

4.nudged everyone twice.. .QED.

Salman's logic :

1. DUS KA DUM MEIN AAPKA SWAGAT HAI.

2. MERE SAATH MAHI KHELA TO KYA KHELA .

3. PEHLA SAWAAL .

4.KITNE PRATISHAT IIT ASPIRANT SOCHTE HAIN KI 2+2 = 5 HOTA HAI.

5.nugo : 90-100

6: SAHI JAWAAB : 99% SOCHTE HAIN 2+2= 5 HOTA HAI ..

7. nugo : baki 1% ??

8. salman : AGLA SAWAAL ....KITNE PRATISHAT SOCHTE HAI.........

Achin Bansal's logic :

1.Those who want free games or books or rapidshare accounts ..say 2+2 = 5.

2: many say 2+2 = 5

3. hence ..2+2 = 5 QED.

Aaaahhhh's logic :

1.Boookkkkkkkkkkkssssss.

2.Loads and loads of booksssssssss.

3..?

4.???

5. 2+2=5 ..and thats that.

6. And yeah ..booooooooookkkkkkkkksssssssssss.

DX logic :

1. For the thousands in attendance..

2.And the millions watching all over the world..

3.Lets get ready to...

4.fix it in our minds that 2+2=5.

5.Those who got problems with that can contact us after midnite.

6.And if you're not down with that ..we've got 2 words for ya ..

7.THE END.

Disclaimer: Content is meant to be laughed at ...no offences .nothing.

Source : The idea and and the upper half is ofcourse from uncyclopedia.