IIT JEE-AIEEE 2012, Entrance Notifications, Study Tips, Engineering Preparation, Practice Test Papers, Experts Advice

yvk aditya

1)
There was once a young man who, in his youth,professed desire to become a
"great" writer. When asked to define "great", he said "I want to write stuff
that the whole workd will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly
emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!
"He now works for Microsoft writing error messages".

2)
1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick ! Jump out of the window
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
3rd thief : Hurry ! this is no time for superstitions.

3)
Man : How old is your father ?
Boy : As old as me
Man : How can that be ?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born

4)
Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field.
Teacher : How ?
Student : Ladies first .

5)
Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.

6)
Daddy : Son, What do you want as Birthday gift ?
Son : I just want a radio dad, surrounded by a sports car.

7)
Girl : Do you live me ?
Boy : yes Dear
Girl : Would you die for me ?
Boy : No , mine is undying love !

8)
Boy : Since we met, I can't eat of drink ....
Girl : Why is that ?
Boy : I'm broke.

9)
Boy : May I hold your hand?
Girl : No thanks , it isn't heavy.

10)
Girl : Did you miss me while I was away?
Boy : Were you away ?

11)
Girl : Who was that girl I saw you kissing last night ?
Boy : What time was it?

12)
Girl : Say you love me ! Say you love me !
Boy : You love me ....

13)
Girl : If we get engaged will you give me a ring ?
Boy : Sure, what's your phone number ?

14)
Girl : I think the poorest people are the happiest ...
Boy : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple ...

15)
Girl : Darling , I want to dance like this forever ..
Boy : Don't you ever want to improve ?

16)
Boy : I live you and I could die for you !
Girl : How soon ?

17)
Boy : I would go to the end of the world for you !
Girl : yes , but would you stay there ?

18)
1st Man : I'm worried about my daughter . She keeps being chased by the doctor
.
2nd Man : has she tried an apple ?

19)
Carol : Do you remember when you proposed to me ? I was so overwhelmed , I
couldn't speak for an hour...
Peter : Yes Darling, that was the happiest hour of my life ...

20)
Sharon : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss ?
Tracy : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.

21)
Starting the day with a conversation between a wife and a husband who happens
to be a Software Engineer.

Husband : (Returning late from work) "Good Evening Dear , I'm now logged in.

Wife : What about my new TV ?
Husband : Variable not found ...

Wife : At least , give me your Credit Card, I want to do some shopping .
Husband : Sharing Violation . Access denied ...

Wife : Do you love me or do you only love computers or are you just being
funny ?
Husband : Too many Parameters ...

Wife : It was a great mistake that I married an idiot like you .
Husband : Data type mismatch.

Wife : You are a useless nut .
Husband : It's by Default .

Wife : What about your salary ?
Husband : File in use ... Try after some time .

Wife : What is my value in the family ?
Husband : Unknown Virus .

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