Future Experts come here and share their knowledge base and concepts with each other. Every article submitted is reviewed by experts. Nickels are awarded to articles in terms of authenticity, relevance, clarity and presentation.
>>> An engineer and a physicist are in a hot-air balloon. After a few hours they lose track of where they are and descend to get directions. They yell to a jogger, "Hey, can you tell us where we're at?" After a few moments the jogger responds, "You're in a hot-air balloon." The engineer says, "You must be a mathematician." The jogger, shocked, responds, "yeah, how did you know I was a mathematician?" "Because, it took you far too long to come up with your answer, it was 100% correct, and it was completely useless." >>> Two hunters are out in the wood
more ...
submitted by Mirka (24 m) on 2 Oct 2008 19:13:39 IST (4 comments 204 views)
1. A vain person: One who loves the smell of his own farts.
2. An amiable person: One who loves the smell of other peoples farts.
3. A proud person: One who thinks his own farts are exceptionally fine.
4. A shy person: One who releases silent farts, then blushes.
5. An impudent person: One who boldly farts out, then laughs.
6. A scientific person: One who farts regularly, but is truly concerned about air pollution.
7. An unfortunate person: One who tries fully hard to fart, but craps instead.
8. A nervous person: One who stops in the middle of a fart.
9. An honest person: One who admits he farted, but offers a good medical reason.
10. A dishonest person: On
more ...
submitted by Rocker.Ronit (6 m) on 29 Aug 2008 00:35:32 IST (0 comments 100 views)
Boss : Where were you born ?sardar : Punjab.Boss : which part ?sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab._________________2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more._________________Sardar : What is the name of your car ?Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadipetrol se start hoti hai._________________Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar whyare you removing a wheel from your auto.sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler
more ...
submitted by lilboyblu (20 m) on 23 Jul 2008 21:14:17 IST (5 comments 182 views)
My name is Bond - Covalent Bond." Q: What's the most important thing to learn in chemistry?A: Never lick the spoon. First law of Laboratorics: Hot glass and cold glass look alike! Here is a funny chemistry story. Somebody wrote a paper about how this chemical, dihydrogenoxide, has killed over 100,000 people world wide, usually through inhalation. The story also went on that even if you wash your food you can never get this chemical off. No matter what you do you will be exposed to this very dangerous chemical every day of your life until you die. The story finished by claiming that there needs to be a government research gr
more ...
submitted by goldknight (395 m) on 1 Apr 2008 16:55:24 IST (4 comments 207 views)
With about 15-20 hrs left 4 the xam of your lives , read this , HAVE FUN A Russian saves his rubbles 4 twenty yrs to buy the car of his choice , he chooses the model and is not very surprised when the salesman tells that it would take 2 yrs for the delivery.He thanks him ,and leaves , on reaching the door , and turns back , and asks the salesman " Do you know which week of the year will I get the car?". The week after exactly 2 yrs from now .the man thanks him and the on reaching he door again turns back and asks ,"Do you know which day of the week ?".The man , a bit annoyed , checks his notes again and tells that , the car can be picked up on Thursday. He thanks
more ...
submitted by srinathmurthy (199 m) on 12 Apr 2008 18:43:23 IST (0 comments 70 views)
I'm not going back to school ever again Why ever not?The teacher doesn't know a thing, all she does is ask questions! ~~~~~~~~~ Mother: How was your first day at school? Son: It was all right except for some man called "Teacher" who kept spoiling all our fun! ~~~~~~~~~ A software engineer was smoking.A lady standing nearby said to him "can't you see the Warning, Smoking is injurious to health..!'. He replied "We are bothered only about Errors, not Warnings !!" ~~~~~~
more ...
submitted by coolriya (482 m) on 8 Apr 2008 03:06:35 IST (0 comments 97 views)
JOKES Interesting Letter to MicrosoftHere's an interesting letter to Microsoft: Dear Microsoft Technical Support,I am desperate for some help. I recently upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began giving unexpectederrors and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources. Thiswasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife 1.0installsitself into all other programs and launches during systeminitializationwhere it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as BoysNight Out 2.5, and Cricket 5.3 no longer run and crash the systemwhenever selected. Attempting to operate Saturday Sports B
more ...
submitted by sahilgupta_iit (529 m) on 25 Feb 2008 22:13:35 IST (3 comments 201 views)
Girlfriend:"And are you sure you love me and noone else?" Boyfriend: "Dead sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday." Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW! Whats the best thing about babies? MAKING EM! At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I hv lst my hand, oh! Santa: Control urself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying? Sometimes when I reflect back on all the ciggarettes I smoked, i feel ashamed. Then I look into the ciggarette & think about the workers in the ciggarette factory & all of their hopes & dreams. If I dont smoke
more ...
[ 1, 2
]
submitted by netkid07 (2009 m) on 2 Jan 2008 00:37:11 IST (21 comments 553 views)
Q: Why dogs don't marry?A: Because they are already leading a dog's life! Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. Several women appeared in court, each accusing the other of the trouble in the flat where they lived. The judge called for orderly testimony. "I'll hear the oldest first," he decreed. The case was closed for lack of evidence. A husband, the owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drove his prize possession...even to the grocery store which was a few blocks from the house.After she insisted, he finally rel
more ...
submitted by netkid07 (2009 m) on 2 Jan 2008 23:07:37 IST (3 comments 175 views)
there were two cats on the opposite sides of a higway. when one of the cats was crossing the road a truck was coming at full speed towards the cat trying to cross the road. what would have the other cat said to the cat trying to cross the road????????? / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / it would have said 'meow' ofcourse, cats cant speak.
more ...
submitted by Raghudevan (135 m) on 29 Aug 2007 21:53:11 IST (4 comments 175 views)
How many first year engineering students does it take to change a light bulb? None. That's a second year subject. How many second year engineering students does it take to change a light bulb? One, but the rest of the class copies the report. How many third year engineering students does it take to change a light bulb?"Will this question be in the final examination?" How many civil engineers does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to do it and one to steady the chandelier. How many electrical engineers does it take to change a light bulb? None. They simply redefine darkness as the industry standard. How many computer engineers does it take to change
more ...
submitted by a4asd (334 m) on 27 Jul 2007 14:43:49 IST (3 comments 142 views)
Sardar jokes 1) NASA was getting ready to launch a very important space shuttle. The scientists and engineers checked and double checked everything to make sure that things are fine. However, on the day of our launch, something seemed to be wrong. The rocket gave all sorts of noise but never took off even an inch from the ground. The engineers were puzzled because they could not figure out the problem. Finally, there was an Sardar who offered&nb
more ...
submitted by rakesh61 (1898 m) on 14 Aug 2007 14:50:37 IST (3 comments 144 views)
LAUGH AND BE MERRY >>>>>>>>A panda bear walks into a restaurant. He orders the special and eats it. After eating, he pulls out a pistol, kills the waiter and starts to walk out the door. The owner of the restaurant says, "Hey, what are you doing? You come in here, you kill my waiter and walk away without saying a word. I don't understand." The panda says, "Look it up in the dictionary," and walks out the door. So the owner gets out a dictionary and looks under the heading "Panda". It reads: panda black and white animal; lives in central China; eats shoots and leaves. >>>>>>>>"Dad, I don't want
more ...
submitted by dilip (62 m) on 11 Aug 2007 10:05:12 IST (0 comments 95 views)
teacher: make a sentence in which 1 word repeated 4 timessardar: lara dutta marries brian lara and she becomes lara lara ============ ========= Teacher: is line ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gya.Santa: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan.... ============ ========= Lect: write a note on Gandhi jayanti..?? So..santa writes "Gandhi was a great man but maa kasam i dont kno
more ...
submitted by amitsingh (273 m) on 6 May 2007 23:53:48 IST (10 comments 334 views)
Best Joke in the world A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: ?My friend is dead! What can I do?? The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: ?Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.? There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: ?OK, now what?? Second
more ...
submitted by vagee (133 m) on 4 May 2007 09:56:31 IST (3 comments 164 views)
LAUGH AND BE MERRY Gabbar: Kitne admi they?Sambha: Sardar 2Gabbar: Mujhe ginti nahin aati, 2 kitne hote hain?Samba: Sardar 2, 1 ke baad aata haiGabbar: Aur 2 ke pehle?Samba: 2 k pehle 1 aata hai.Gabbar: To beech mein kaun ata hai?Samba: Beech mein koi nahi aata>Gabbar:: To phir dono ek saath kyun nahin aate?Samba: 1 k baad hi 2 aa sakta hai, kyun ki 2, 1 se bada hai.Gabar: 2, 1 se kitna bada hai?Samba: 2, 1 se 1 bada hai.Gabbar:
more ...
submitted by d5 (49 m) on 7 May 2007 19:47:35 IST (0 comments 109 views)
Do you deserve to enter heaven? A man died and went to heaven. An angel met him at the Gates of Heaven and said, 'Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you - we've examined your whole life, and you really didn't do anything particularly good or bad. We're not sure whether we can admit you into heaven or not. Can you tell us anything exceptional you did that can help us make a decision?' The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, 'Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a group of goons. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the leader of the gang. He was a big, muscula
more ...
submitted by amitsingh (273 m) on 4 May 2007 01:39:49 IST (0 comments 97 views)
Top 10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations1. At the movies:When you meet acquaintances/ friends.. .Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?Answer:- Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here...2. In the bus:A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt?Answer:- No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.. ...why don't youtry again.3. At a funeral:One of the teary-eyed people ask...Stupid Question:- Why, why him, of all people.Answer:- Why? Would it rather have been you?4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiterStupid Question:-Is the "Butter Paneer Masala" good??Answer:-
more ...
submitted by gundadude (0 m) on 28 Apr 2007 14:30:06 IST (6 comments 169 views)
One Liners ? The easiest way to make your old car run better, is to check the prices of new car. ? Sometimes when I reflect back on all the ciggarettes I smoked, i feel ashamed. Then I look into the ciggarette & think about the workers in the ciggarette factory & all of their hopes & dreams. If I dont smoke this ciggarette, they might be out of work & their dreams would be shattered, Then I say to myself, it's better that I smoke this ciggarette & let their dreams come true then be selfish & worry about my LUNGS. ? Several women appeared in court, each accusing the other of the trouble in the flat where they l
more ...
submitted by gundadude (0 m) on 28 Apr 2007 20:14:41 IST (0 comments 70 views)
